Allure of the Seas (part two)

photo 1 (1)Well we are back on-board this magnificent ship , the Navigator of the Seas is right beside us and a Norwegian ship is on the other dock with a Carnival ship beside it. That is quite the sight all these ships together. We board with ease ….meaning no line ups , what a treat !

We did the whole day at the beach in Cozumel , our tour was only four hours but we stayed there all day. We like to live on the edge….us old people …cab fare was only twenty bucks to get back.

We have sand in our special places again but not as bad as the last time. It’s a good thing we are celibate because this condition could give new meaning to  the phrase:  ’rough sex’ …hahahah …ok kids I know your eyes are bleeding from reading this part…sorry.

 The snorkelling produced some interesting finds….Mayan ruins under the water , now how cool is that? This place has everything.  We can drink all we want at the open bar , but I only have one drink ….sex on the beach.

Nah…not gonna say anything there. But …dam…there are no cup holders  on our lounge chairs. So life is not so perfect here after all and I think you all  would just hate it. 🙂

I want to give some insight to this place but we were on a tour and the guide was half asleep or just didn’t care to impart any insights about this place on the way here. Taxi driver on way back could not speak English , I really do need to learn Spanish.

Mexico is…..well Mexico…! We are coming back here on the next cruise which leaves on Sunday with Carnival , so maybe I will dig deeper for some tidbits then.

photo 4 (1)Now this is something that is kinda ironic. We are warned in our newsletters about fatalities and accidents and injuries to guests from renting scooters, motorcycles and jet skis and we are advised against doing these things…ok got it?

So Captain Johnny (he is kinda famous in the Royal Fleet, very personal and always friendly and approachable to guests), well he has not one  but TWO Harleys on board. We see that one of them has been unloaded on the dock today….like really?

I mean if one of the guests dies …well ..so be it. But who the hell is going to drive this ship if he ends up as road kill? I mean it is something to consider. Anyway , just thought I would share that with you.

 I have nothing more , but the evening is just starting and we have a comedy show tonight.

Well dinner runs late and we meet a couple that put the snobby British couple on our England tour to shame. OMG …. I am still hurting.

photo 1They are from Florida and we now know everything about their great life. They have intelligent children ,  great friends  and they are soooo special that Sharon and I want to stick needles in their eyes !!! (He sells health insurance but was a famous college basketball coach ….do I mention here that he is short? )

He also wants to enlighten us about what is wrong with our health system and then gets going on Obamacare .

lord please open up this floor and suck em under….

Oh …and…and….she has every degree there is and went to school until her fifties? Really? That is sooooooo interesting …. oh my god , there is more …she teaches really gifted children one day a week…ok kill me now!!!!

The other couple which I hope to run into again are from Edmonton (Sharons home town). The wife has just gone back to work after eight months. Turns out she has had a stem cell transplant and is really optimistic about her chances with this new procedure. Turns out, she has a rare blood disorder .

Florida boors wife butts in about how attitudes and lifestyles can determine the outcome in these situations. I want to ask her if she has a degree in that too. ….geeze….

photo 2 (1)Ya now….I just DON’T freaken care if you have a girlfriend from when you were a baby. Nor do I care that you and all your great girlfriends from the time of Noahs Ark ,  all get together once a month.

Sharon comes up with a show stopper for degree babe. Sharons cousin Amanda is at Oxford …. which stops degree bag from putting mouthful of food in her mouth. “Really?“, she says…“that is very expensive!”

“Not really,” Sharon adds, “Oxford offered her a scholarship”.

ZAP …good one Sharon (Sharon doesn’t like to cause waves , so I know she is really irritated as well).

 OK ….whew…. We tour around the ship and call it a night.

This ship is the first ship ever that we are not lost most of the time trying to figure out which way to go where. Each floor has a big screen situated when you get off the elevators and need to turn and go right or left .

photo 2On the screen is everything you need to know and so simple to navigate with big lettering (so important for those of us that are getting older and are blind). The pictures really help us to navigate.

If all else fails, we have color-coding. Our part of the ship is pink and there are discreet lines in all of our signage . If we are in  pink, we know that we are in our own area. Also on each screen is a play by play of what is happening at what time and where!

OH and ….and...most important feature boys and girls…MAP IT ! Oh how I love the MAP IT feature. It shows me where I am and then little dotted lines to get where I want to go and on what floor it is ! I feel like I am in first grade and life is so simple again, this is genius !

I am geographically and directionally challenged and I have to ‘see it’ or you need to draw me a picture . Well… this is exactly what they have done and everyone is commenting on how easy it is to get around on this beast.