Have you ever made a decision and wondered … hmmm… was that the right choice or should I have.. hmmm
We do it with food all the time. Should I buy this or maybe that, can we have that treat or .. fill up with veggies, maybe do the proteins? Skip the bread aisle or maybe we need the whole grains….. yes, too many decisions.
Dam that lemon pie for calling out my name! I knew when I bought it that I would eat the whole dam thing.. OK.. so I live alone.
Some decisions are easy while others are not (well it was hard NOT to eat the whole pie… just sayin). The smaller ones are easy to make or break.
Fact is, we live and die with bigger decisions never made… for some people.
That could have been me, but for fate intervening. Well it really wasn’t fate.. maybe courage, to make the tough decision. Sometimes though, life throws you a curve ball and fate plays into it! That is why I prefer making all my own decisions, not chancing fate.
I have found that once you have made a big decision, the smaller ones fall into place. Like deciding not to buy that whole pie and just buying a tart instead… makes more sense. (and a good choice.. I felt so holy, lol) ok, so a little humour..
Real life decisions are not always clear cut. Living at the lake was always my dream. I realized that dream for the first time last summer. Oh, we have always had a lakeside cabin, but being self employed never gave us enough time to really enjoy it.
Funny thing that, when we had ‘real jobs’ working for others we always had time to spend at the lake. Being self employed and a
caterer to boot… gave us precious little time… esp. summer. That being our busiest time.
This ‘dream’ had me cutting grass, putting gas in machinery and boats and coping with a lot of things that the ex used to do (and that is not a bad thing). I took the pontoon boat out a couple times until I got stranded on the lake, with motor problems… the ex could fix anything, but hey.. they have people for that right?
I ventured back to my city condo very little and only to do laundry and pay bills.. oh, and to have a shower with real water (not lake water). Most of my summer was spent there at the lake looking out from my deck and admiring the serenity and beauty that surrounded me.
A funny thing is happening though.. when you get what you always wanted. Hmmmm… is this really what I thought it would be? For me, last summer was great and yes that is what I wanted. This year I am not so sure.
My water line comes from my sons cistern and my sewer line runs into his septic tank (his cabin is beside mine). We are ‘connected’ together once more.. but now I am the ‘dependent ‘ one. My arrival here is later this year because he is busy and not here to start the water flowing.
A thawed freezer awaits my attention from a cord my son unplugged when he drained the water lines last fall. A broken water line under the sink.. dam! A week later and plumbing problems force me back home till he can fix it yet again.
I have gone four days without a shower and hot water. My condo is looking pretty attractive with hot water and two working bathrooms and I make use of those amenities.
Back at the cabin once more, two unexpected house guests from hell, make an appearance in the traps I leave set up! Can hantavirus be far behind? I need to buy that foam stuff and crawl under the cabin and find where they are getting in.. do they have people for that I wonder?
The weather is still cold, we are one week into June and the lilacs are just starting to bloom (an early May thing). I am missing my condo pool (heated) and hot tub. The lake water is much too cold for swimming and my bones are much more ‘attuned’ to the frigid waters… don’t go in there… they are silently screaming at me!!!!
While making a hurried return to my cabin (son was there to make repairs and I deadlocked it) I forgot drinking water. I am up and making a perfect cup of coffee (from precious little water), I can almost taste it. My kitchen here is not user friendly, I can only reach one cupboard. I am vertically challenged (cupboards are so high) but they look good. The plugin is beyond my reach in a far corner.
The light switch even needs a wooden spoon attached to my hand, to flip it on! So I plug my coffee pot into the stove.. but have to pull it out from under the low cupboard so I can get the coffee pod in. My microwave cord is never going to work without an extension cord hanging over my stove….
I keep my humour while doing all this and once again wonder, what were they thinking? (my son did the renos with a friend ) Coffee is in my mug and I am looking forward to sipping this leisurely on the deck.
I push the coffee maker back into the corner and while doing this I knock over the mug that contains this precious elixir that was destined to sooth my morning soul. oh crap !!
Suddenly a big decision starts looming..
I eke out enough water to make another cup and I retire back to the deck to contemplate life, my coffee and the view.. decisions.. decisions