I sobbed through the first part of the slide show at the family wedding on the week-end. This was directly after turning to my girlfriend and telling her to please not get weepy when Louis Armstrong started singing “it’s a wonderful world”… She lost her husband suddenly last year while on vacation (they had a great marriage).
A picture of my sister (no longer here) and the bride (my niece) appeared onscreen. I was immediately lost it in an emotional tidal wave of memories and love that sprung forth from my heart.. flowing freely and unchecked down my face! I was powerless to stop the flow and thank goodness the room was dark.. the music muffled my sobs..
This unexpected river of souls bursting forth and making their presence known, is still with me now as I sit here writing this. Many ‘family’ pictures including all of us back in the day. So many gone now, some too early, but wow.. my niece brought them all back.. for her wedding to her soul mate!
My niece was clearly marrying the love of her life. How any times have we been to weddings thinking hmmmm.. I wonder if this is going to last? Well we all hope for the best, and get caught up in the moment, but my own experiences make me jaded. I want to be that person that calls out “Don’t do it!” when called upon.
This was not that wedding.. and it was all perfect. Well I will prefix that with, as perfect as any family wedding can be. Personally I connected with those I love and that is all that matters to me. Bringing family and friends together to bear witness is what weddings are about.
On another note, and I have to talk about this as well.. weddings can also bring about or exacerbate family relationships that are not ‘harmonious’. Because I am older and somewhat mellow, these ones do not get any real estate in my head. To some they matter a lot, and I’ll address that part.
Family weddings are a chance to re-unite and strengthen these bonds. This was what I experienced, my friends I haven’t seen for years and even my brothers family .. his daughter being the bride.. brought us closer together. The partners of these kids get looked over and we pass judgment and deem them worthy or not.. it happens.
Some have to sit across the room from each other and so be it. Others don’t attend for what ever reason suits them best and that is ok too. There are also the forgotten ones, yes it happens, and that is too bad. For what-ever reason not everyone is invited, well cost is a big issue I know.
I love this niece and wouldn’t have missed her wedding for anything.. I would have crashed it even, if I didn’t get an invite. Actually I did crash her daughters wedding a few years back.. but I digress.. Family is important and these weddings are getting fewer. Expense plays a part.. but also, many are just opting to live together.
My only point to this blogpost is to tell my niece she did good! That slideshow was brilliant and said it all…
We are family.. those in attendance and those from beyond, and even those who chose to stay away or were forgotten.. we were all there in your spirit!
and that’s all that counts … amen !
PS: we give the food a two thumbs up.. just sayin..