Well here it is thanksgiving. I was all set to order in Chinese food.. that’s what I kept telling myself weeks before.
Why slave over a stove all day? The kids show up and immediately set out to destroy your cleaned up mess.. and inhale everything in approx. 20 minutes anyway. Why not just order in and enjoy their company? They send a text what’s for supper? I text back it will be a surprise.
I break down the day before and decide to cook a ham, scalloped potatoes and roasted vegetables, the whole nine yards! Truth is, I have been out with the girlfriends and eating out most of the week, I’d like a home-cooked meal. Turkey is out because they have had their fill from other obligations.
First thing my grandson does upon arriving was go directly to the fridge and proceeded to inventory everything in it. I interrupt him and give him a big hug (while closing the fridge door) I am so happy to see him.. he has grown and I can’t get used to his lower voice. Well actually first thing .. I had to drag him out of my bedroom (twice)! He had found my big magnifying mirror and was checking out his zits.. geeze.. meanwhile his mom is stretched out on top of my bed, texting.
He decides he wants some milk so back into the fridge he goes, pours some milk, takes a drink and pours the rest down the sink! “Did you just pour that milk down the sink I shrill at him?” “Well it tastes like water..” he says.. “and relax it was only a 1/4 cup”. Oh my.. just keep it together, he is a teenager after all.
His mom meantime is now checking out my clothes to see if anything interests her (she is leaving for Vegas with her boyfriend the next day). I decide it is time for wine and open first bottle of white.
Grandson then plops down on the arm of my big leather reclining chair and I can see it starting to wobble. I tell him to sit in it properly.. he sits there for 5 seconds then heads over to crank up the white leather stools I have butting up to my center island. He perches atop one of these wiggling them and fidgets back and forth until I ask nicely (or was it nicely…hmmm) to crank it down because they are just cheap chairs and could break. I pour myself more wine.
Tiring of the stool or maybe he is looking to annoy me on purpose now.. he plops (why can’t he just lower himself into things.. why must he always take a running leap and plop?) into my leather office chair on wheels and proceeds to wheel himself around the living room and kitchen on my bamboo floor (they mark up easily and are not very tuff). So I motion him out of that chair and claim it for myself.. just to keep him out of it. I am starting to wonder what was it I missed about him?
My granddaughter appears with new boyfriend.. flowers, gaudy piece of jewelry and a card signed by them and (anyone else that wants in on this) typical for us. (we also share a love of gaudy jewelry)
While waiting for the rest of my brood to appear, the appetizers are disappearing at an alarming rate, into grandsons stomach! I cut the celery into narrower stalks while he wanders over to the stove and starts picking at the top crusts of my homemade buns.. “for gods sake take a bun” am I shrilling again, I wonder? I pour myself another glass of wine. I tell someone.. anyone.. text your uncle and see what’s taking him so long! Did I sound desperate I wonder?
Grandson proceeds to pick at the ham while I bring out the roasted vegetables and scalloped potatoes. I try to steer everyone to the red wine (because I like the white) but it is no use.. my two bottles of white are empty .. drat!
Ok we need to be real here.. who among us that actually does all of this cooking .. gets to really enjoy this spread we manage to produce? We are always last.. waiting for everyone to help themselves (I do it buffet style on my counter.. I live in a condo now, with not much space). Then we pop up and down to fetch this and that.. well some do .. I just sit down and drink my wine.. whew! I am exhausted already, “aren’t you going to eat mom” asks my son.. so I regretfully set down my wine and go fix a plate.
I notice my grandson only has ham on his plate and buns (he has demolished most of the appetizers, I’m thinking). He does or says something to annoy his mom and his sister now, I turn to my daughter and say “you should have ate him when he was born” (some species do eat their young) and my daughter agrees.. then my grand daughter pipes up .. ” ya.. and nana .. you should have ate mom!”
“ Ah.. the circle of life.. and Happy Thanksgiving to you and yours…