sorry/not sorry, Covid 19 again (my musings this week)
I was a little harsh with someone close to me yesterday. My response should have been softer and gentler. The problem I have is with the thoughtless comments thrown about carelessly. It’s that careless attitude that many, mostly younger adults, have. Those of us who want to play it safe tend to avoid it. I quote “if they want to stay safe, then they should stay home” or “they shouldn’t go or be in places that put them at risk.”
I’m the person who is trying to keep myself safe. I’ve only been to grocery stores, always with a mask, and a couple of Staples stores because I need a new computer. Crowds make me nervous, I definitely don’t shake hands, and hugging is only reserved for my kids, period!
“I’m not going to quit living my life because of this virus” is the most often heard comment I hear, given to those of us who are trying to keep safe. Here’s a news flash for those of you living your life your way: I need to stay away from you. I don’t need you to lecture me either; your attitude is not very nice.
Let’s be clear here, this is not a rant against you, it’s only me trying to explain as best I can, how I feel. My world got a whole lot smaller than most since this virus. I love travelling, and having a second home in Arizona is such a joy to get away from the frigid cold winters here at home.
I’m a sociable person and love meeting new people and making new friends. I’m not a recluse, that’s for sure. Quarantine when I got back home to Canada was necessary, and the ensuing isolation was not easy. I chose to accept it and live with it. I’m an optimist, and I do what I have to do.
I pick my battles and choose my playing fields, if you will, I weigh my risks and act accordingly. The rules here in Saskatchewan have been relaxed somewhat, and it’s been a little easier. I’m still cautious and I know my risk factor, and to be honest, I think I wouldn’t fare well if I get this virus. After being holed up for so long, I decided to move to the lake for the summer. May as well be outside in the fresh air and rain for 12 days straight … until I wanted to slit my wrists, lol, but I digress.
So, being in my condo for two months and then moving to the lake was a nice change. I’m still cautious, having coffee breaks while social distancing with my cousins and friends, helps A LOT. I have lots of room here for that. When we got to hug our families again, my life was complete. My kids’ hugs are my lifeline.
I still don’t have a man, but don’t need one to complete me. I do need my family, though. That’s not to say I’ve quit looking for my soul mate, but rather I am enjoying not having to shave my legs, you need to be female to appreciate that one : )
Weighing my risks carefully when I venture out is part of my life now. I think this may be a part of everyone’s life going forward. I hope this isn’t so, but damn, do you think this is going to just disappear with a vaccine? What if it’s just a dress rehearsal for what our future is going to look like?
I go about my life evaluating my risks and what I’m comfortable with. My feelings are that some of us, like me, all have different levels of risks we are willing to accept. This is not to be confused with “oh.. so you are ok with that, but not ok with this?” Please give us the courtesy of our judgment of our own risk-taking.
When you plop down beside me, into a chair outside, that was just vacated by someone I deemed ok to sit beside, is NOT ok. Spouting off remarks that you are not going to quit living your life your way doesn’t make it alright to jeopardize my wanting to keep a safe distance.
Believe it or not, I want to live my life as well, I didn’t quit living, and neither did the others of us who are being careful. I’m a hugger too, and I hate that I can’t hug my friends or touch them. AND PLEASE quit saying I should stay home and isolated..
I’m doing the best I can under the circumstances. I’m ALWAYS evaluating the risk factors when I go out or socialize. You may think, because I’m here at a party in a huge yard, that I’m a hypocrite. Well, sweetie, I am doing my dammedest to keep a balance in my life… so get the f#%k out of that chair and take your attitude with you, oops, my outside voice, sorry/not sorry.
Oh.. and there are exceptions to every rule, Tom and Miguel, you know who you are…
Copyright August 5th, 2020