loving, living and dying.. laughing, sobbing and crying..

Those of you that read my blog know that I don’t hold much back. I try to ‘do no harm’ and don’t use names very often. I write about everything and solve nothing.. well that’s not totally true. I do use this blog to write about what matters in my life and I like sharing the good, the bad and the ugly.. if it will help someone else on their journey.

Today is kind of a shitty day.. I just read an email from my uncle. I am setting up a visit with him next week. I wrote addressing  him as my favorite Uncle.. it was a kinda joke, seeing as how I don’t have any other Uncles. I don’t call him Uncle anyway, actually..  we are only seven years apart in age.

We kibitz back and forth a bit by email.. one email contained only one word.. “bastard!” I’ll explain.. it was not as bad as it sounds. On one of my earlier visits I was lamenting the rise of the loonie.. everyday it went up I cursed! Earlier in June I turned a chunk of Canadian money, 5000.00 bought me just 36oo.oo American dollars. (needing it for rental monies I owed down there)

I was NOT a happy camper! The loonie decided to go on an upward journey from that day forward! My Uncle sent me an email about the loonies spiraling rise (a direct jab in my hurtful spot) which prompted the ‘bastard’ response. We do share a quirky sense of humour. He also responds with replies like “I suppose if you have to come, I could find some room for you in the basement”.

I adore my Uncle and my Aunt (she left this world last March). www.my-thirdlife.com/Dementia a true love story. He has battled cancer three times during my Aunts own journey with dementia.. and was selfless and loving in all aspects of taking care of her. I consider him a true hero and someone we can all be so proud of.

My uncle is an example to me that there are men out there that are deserving of our love and devotion. He also happens to be a fair and non judgmental person and that is rare as well. Maybe I am cynical and I suppose I am. There is a lot of crap that happens in every family and ours is no different, but my aunt and uncle always brought levity and wisdom to every situation.

I was forced to move my outhouse at the lake, (back in the day before I had running water) a newly minted survey had put it on a relatives piece of land. The relative then went complaining to my Uncle when I only moved it three feet over onto my new property line, “Well you did tell her to move it and she did.. so what are you complaining about?” he laughed as he related this to me.

He doesn’t take sides and allows me to vent or just listens to whatever I am going on about. He is also hard of hearing and wears a hearing aid. He nods yet again at something I’ve said and it dawns on me that he is listening to the hockey game on TV in the living room.. in his hearing aids!

Dam.. he had me fooled, and is a little sheepish I caught him out, so I give up, and go back to my computer and he retires to the living room and watches the game. I say out loud “I am wishing I had more time down south” and he says “what.. you are going fishing with your mouth?” or something like that.. omg.. it is just tooo funny.

We binge watched the poker channel .. last time I was there. I say “it is all in the luck of the cards“.. he says “it is all skill” and we argue back and forth. When it is over, I am totally exhausted, you’d think it was my money they were playing with, it is very late!

I head down to bed to find an ibuprofen gel cap in a little dish on my pillow. I had lost it last time I was there and worried about his grandchildren finding it and thinking it was a candy. The next morning before leaving I deposit a wrapped candy I had taken from a restaurant, in its place. We seem to find humour everywhere.. even when there is none.

I talked to him last week about going south.. my flight was booked already or I could have got a ride with him. He said no way he wanted to go with me.. I liked to stop everywhere, and he is a drive straight through kinda person. He was also waiting to hear back from his doctors on tests for cancer that still seemed to be in his body.

Today I got a message from him. It is straight forward and mater of fact.. just like him.

guess its time for me to take the next step of my journey.
There will not be any ‘curable’ options for me to take regarding treatment of my cancer and it will not be long before I can no longer look after myself.. It’s time to move along.

We are all going to die I know.. I could even go before him. We are not guaranteed any time here on this earth. He sets an example for me and others .. may I have the grace that he possesses when my turn comes. Meanwhile he says he has the dungeon prepared for my visit.. so I go to enjoy and annoy my favorite uncle..