On my blog is a man’s view on sex and love which I’d been keeping for quite some time before I decided to post it (see uncensored, love and sex a man’s perspective). I have always wanted to respond to his view with one of my own but until recently have not figured out what mine is, I think I have it now.
‘The need to breed’ as he puts it probably exiss in women too, but much softer, we want babies. We do not foresee the teenage years that lay ahead of wanting those sweet adorable beings. It is not until then, that we realize why some species eat their young!
I think we are also programmed for sex and the need to propagate the species, but we are much more discerning. Where-as a man will pretty much ‘hump anything’ we are much pickier about our ‘humping’, or our cake, as I have referred to it in earlier posts regarding sex in my blogging. (see sex and cake, uncensored)
I think once we have found that right person that we think will make such a cute baby, lordy, lordy has any mother ever produced an ugly baby .. well to her anyway. Once we have that baby, sex can kinda wane until we want another one, too bad we couldn’t wait until they were a teenager before we made that decision right?
I totally agree about having sex and making love. We have all had sex, all of us properly married ones right? Some of us even tried to propagate the species (not on purpose) before we were married, and you know who you are. So ok, what the heck is wrong with that? (if you are my granddaughter reading this NO.. it is not ok!)
Men leave physical evidence of their sexual release, but in women, it is much harder to discern. I always thought that it would be great to be a man and be able to ‘eat cake’ any time you want, with anyone you want, and not be beholding to that person, what freedom that could be. That is.. of course if you like eating cake.
A lot of women have lost the desire for that ‘delicious piece’ (pun intended) and that really is too bad. We are programmed to give and to nurture and keep everyone happy, and we are pretty good at what we do except for those darn teenagers.
Ok now where was I? We are programmed to give, even in the bedroom and most of us haven’t learned how to receive. Before going any further I also need to say here that some men are takers and don’t really know about the give and you shall recieve example in lovemaking and that is a shame. A taker will never know the joy of intimacy, which in my humble opinion takes making love to another whole level. Even kissing at this level can be a sexually fulfilling, trust me.
Women need to relax their vigil on being responsible always for the others well-being and just concentrate on their own happy place. You know, that ‘happy place’ we go there sometimes by ourselves, ya.. that one! Let’s share that one with our partners.
Try letting down your guard and (this is for those of you that have lost interest in ‘cake’). Let your partner ‘give’ to you and permit yourself’ to ‘receive’ but more importantly let yourelf just feel. Don’t be responsible to anyone other than yourself.
That is what true intimacy and making love is all about. When you let that other person into the very core of your being you have also given them something very special. By sharing yourself you have allowed them to experience the joy of giving. This is not easy for us women, we need to have a lot of trust.
Now to be fair , if you are partnered with a ‘taker’ this may never happen, and that is why a lot of women give up on sex. If you are one of those men that is not getting any, then start by just giving pleasure .. just giving it, no strings attached! If you are one of those women that have lost interest, then try letting down your guard and let him give and let yourself feel.
Should you be thinking, gee it would be nice to make another baby with your ‘new-found sexual intimacy and pleasure’ well sure I guess, but hopefully you have gone through menopause and thank god for that.
Sexual pleasure and intimacy will only get better when you age and for me having been newly minted on the singles scene after age sixty. I gotta tell ya ladies it is not only possible but also a real awakening. When they say the best is yet to cum.. (sorry couldn’t help it) it is true!
Then there is that other saying, you know the one, “if I could be young again and know what I know now“ I would never have had those teenagers! lol
ok just one more thing I have learned in my old age, sex without love and intimacy in my opinion, is not ‘worth it. Humping is for the guys and the young. (that is unless Tom Selleck shows up on my doorstep, then all bets are off, just saying.)