happy endings .. kill me now

I’m not sure what generation bastardized my ‘happy endings’ but trust me.. I am not happy! Don’t get me wrong though, I love happy endings, both kinds it seems. Getting caught in a double entendre meaning, is not good if you belong to a writers group from Toronto. Well no one actually said anything to me and they are being polite I’m sure, but I am somewhat mortified.

I sent in a piece for my presentation on Monday, the group meets for two hours every Monday on Zoom. Three people present a ‘story’ for critiquing and we have a discussion after. Along with my story I sent an apology for my critique of another writers piece from this past Monday. I didn’t like his story, it was depressing and devoid of any hope or happy. He sent out a little message while we were critiquing it “don’t hold back on your criticizing.” Those of you that know me, know that that’s all I needed to let it pour outta me. “Well I’m sorry ___ (persons name here) but I would kill off both characters in your story, in fact it was so depressing I wanted to kill myself.” “You did say don’t hold back, and I haven’t.”

Now as I’m writing this I’m trying to remember if I said “well you guys know that I’m a fan of happy endings.” Lord kill me now, did I actually verbalize that at the meeting? Well I certainly put it down on paper when I sent in my piece for next Monday. So sending an apology on paper for killing off his characters, I mention how I’m a fan of happy endings (thank you Dan). Dan is another writer who’s stories always make me laugh and feel good. So now I involved Dan (not his real name) in my happy endings .. oh God, can it get any worse?

Most of this loose group of writers are younger than me and very good at their craft. I feel like the token oddball, which I am because everyone else is an easterner and I’m the only person from out west. I am just a blogger trying to be a writer and I have started writing a book, two books actually.. don’t even ask.

Nothing is ever simple for me, I make my own rules and my own excitement, apparently. This happy endings is a thing with me, I hate a story that has no redeeming features. That movie “No Country for Old Men’ that won an academy award for best picture years ago.. well that was the worst movie I have ever watched! There was not one ounce of redemption or happy in that movie whatsoever.

My daughter informed me of the other happy endings meaning some time ago but I keep forgetting. I’m a fan of both btw :  ) She also clued me in when I was lamenting the fact that I needed a ‘facial’ in the near future. Now why did they have to bastardize that as well? Seriously.. some things should be non-negotiable, and a facial and happy endings are should be on that list. That I wear ‘thongs’ on my feet is fine with me, I still have trouble saying flip flops.. that is for people that keep changing their minds or their political affiliations.

There is surely a whole ‘whack’ of other sayings that the younger generation has sexualized, unbeknownst to me. I appreciate the heads up when I use them, trying to be a writer I need to be careful with my words. That doesn’t stop me from making up my own words though, it happens. My dilemma now, is how to quit saying happy endings? My son says I say “you know” a lot and I’m working on that, you know?

I’m older and it’s not as easy to let stuff like this go, I can do it, but my memory screws with my mind. How did you like that one? eh..

We need to be mindful or maybe we need less on our minds .. geez, when did all this shit get so complicated? At least my kids know when I mix up their names that its not personal, and they also know what I meant to say when I get confused sometimes. And that salad I forgot in the fridge thanksgiving, well it wasn’t the first time and it certainly won’t be the last. So now that I have written about it maybe I can let it go..

Two more sleeps until Monday and my Zoom meeting with my peers. Lord help me get through this without making an ass of myself..

and hopefully we all live happily ever after

The End