Winter boots or bust!

Living in minus 20 to 30 temps is not for everyone, and its not for me either, this virus is never-ending. Are we sick of it yet, of course we are, stupid question. I thrive being around others, living by myself is such a drag. I’m either cooking up a storm for nobody but myself, or eating cereal when the junk food is gone. Ten long months and other than a recent outing for day surgery, I’m ready for .. what?

Well I started this blog yesterday and it turns out I was not suffering with enough due diligence. The great ‘Leveler’ of all things human, made a visit to me as I slept. I woke up not being able to walk, well that’s not totally true, I can hop, if hopping at my age is possible. I don’t own a walker but that could be in my future. My brain is already thinking of possible inventions to disguise a three pronged cane as a broom (when not in use). This particular human ‘Leveler’ is called GOUT and if you’ve never had it, touch wood because there was a time I never had it either.

Gout is up there with sciatica and a strangulated hernia (well almost, on that last one). Excruciating pain accompanies gout, if it is in your toe, foot, ankle or knee then it prohibits any walking, well hopping or dragging said appendage can be done. It seems that growing old is hazardous to my health. When everything is working fine I forget about that bout with gout, and there-in lies my folly.

NEVER take anything for granted, least of all your health. There was a time I had no clue what gout was, I only knew that my toe was so swollen and painful that my sheet could not even rest on it.. what kind of hell  is this I wondered? It was hard to walk, it was hard to sleep it was that painful and I had no clue what was happening to me. Thank the Lord for the colchicine pills my doctor prescribed for me. Oh ya and once you get it, it comes back to get you again, this time in the ankle, it likes to mix it up a bit! My doctor prescribed so many pills “keep them on hand, when your gout goes away” I had no idea why he said that, now I never go anywhere without them.

I was saving myself to go out today, its only five sleeps to xmas and of course I am not ready. I asked my kids what kind of junk food they liked and if they had a drug of choice they preferred. My xmas shopping is going to be done at Shoppers Drug Mart. They laughed and maybe you are too, but I was serious and that is still my plan. I haven’t been to a Walmart since I was down south ten months ago. And so it was.. that I ventured out on Saturday, it warmed up and I needed winter boots so bad. I went in early, masked with gloves and a purpose. Find a pair of boots, in and out in the shortest possible time. I walked past the carts because this is an ‘in and out’ procedure only, virtually painless.

I picked up two little containers of blueberries on the way in because they were on special 1.97 each. I then stopped and looked at a display of headbands, gloves and toques in purple and picked them up for my little granddaughter. A rack of the softest nighties caught my eye, I picked out a Christmassy one for the lake for myself. I am in a full sweat when I finally get to the boots. My arms are full and all the cheap winter boots are in sizes I outgrew years ago. Damn, now I have to put stuff down to try on the more expensive ones. This was definitely not a grab and go. It was turning into an ordeal, sweating and breathing through that mask and trying to bend over (not pretty) trying on boots. A sales gal asked if I was finding everything I wanted, I hissed out a “NO, do you have more sizes in the back?” She sweetly informed me everything was out on the shelves and then left to do more dusting.

I finally found a pair at twice the cost I wanted to pay. Picking up my stuff, carrying the boots, the nightie, toque gloves and headband and the blueberries I proceeded to a checkout. Just before the checkout there were bags of  ju jubes or whatever you call them, huge bags for only five dollars. Two of my grandkids loved them, so I grabbed two bags and almost lost everything I was carrying. I am now hot, sweaty, shallow breathing and starting to panic. I realize I am in self checkout, shit.. before I go into a full meltdown a young salesclerk comes up to me and says “follow me, I’ll help you”.

The young salesclerk was so nice, she proceeded to do all the work for me. I realized that the stuff I had carried around for the past half hour was not all there. I must have dropped the gloves, head band and toque, when I picked up the bags of candy… damn. There was no way in hell I was going back to find them.

My foray into Walmart made my heart beat faster, so much stuff.. so little time.. and no friggen cart! BUT I got my winter boots! I’ll be quite honest with you, that was totally exhausting and I don’t plan on going back. Thank goodness for Shoppers Drug mart, and still a few more days .. til xmas.