part three of THE Caribbean CRUISE..

OK THIS IS WHERE I LEFT OFF FOR THOSE OF YOU THAT ARE CRUISING WITH ME (part three)

You know that origami class we sucked at? I would like to mention if you have ever wondered if you were somewhat mentally challenged or if someone has suggested to you the same, you really should take that  class. I promise you will know within the first three folds, and yes we qualify for the challenged part. Take the class anyway, it will make you humble, just sayin. We skipped the afternoon class where we needed to bring a dollar for napkin folding, I’m sorry but our loonies already look like birds.

Having this full day at sea I am going to check out the internet before lunch and taking the rest of the day off. I buy internet minutes, geeze are they ever going make this cheaper? A hundred dollars for 250 minutes but I need to stay in touch back home and my gf can share them with me. I want to learn how to put up pictures on face book, or maybe a video. (this was several years ago, I have since learned how to do this)

After eating a bbq lunch on deck to the funky sounds of a calypso band, we order one of those super frozen sledgehammer drinks. A storm rolls in and we seek out our room to sleep it off.. the storm or our drink? hmmm.

.We took in a hypnotist show last night, it was hilarious. I learned something about myself at that show, seems I CAN be hypnotized. My gf kept her promise to not turn me in. Audience members could follow along and put their hand up if anyone succumbed, well I definitely am one of those people but I was stopped short of making a fool of myself. BUT if he is on again and I am going for it (I will make sure I don’t wear a dress, long story).

Supper was with a couple from Germany and Jersey and another couple from Washington. We meet people from all over the world on these cruises. A delicious supper once again, we had good intentions to pass on dessert but that bread pudding was on the menu again….dam!

We take a pass on Dazzies, it is country music night and I would sooner stick needles in my eyes than listen to music that is sad, depressing, make you feel down an out, well you get the picture. I was force fed country music when married, when I got a divorce it included country music as well : ) Thank goodness it is too cold in there for my gf, she will go to bed happy lol.

The next day dawns hot and muggy and we are in Columbia (Cartagena) and it is so humid that sweat starts pouring off us as soon as we leave the ship. We walk through a garden/zoo? that is filled with parrots roaming free and pink flamingos. Monkeys are hanging out in the mango trees, it is really kind of exciting and my girlfriend and I don’t remember this place. I think we took a tour right from the dock last time we were here. I should mention that on a previous visit here, I expected Columbia to be all jungle with Juan Valdez descending a dirt mountain path with coffee bean sacks hanging on either side of his donkey. Cartagina, Columbia has a skyline of skyscrapers along with lush vegetation.

We are going solo, no booked tours, and  taxi guys start harassing us right away as we emerge from our beautiful exit through the garden/zoo. They are being very aggressive and we almost give up and go back to the ship until a mini bus guy waves us over, he has two seats left if we hurry. Did I mention we are melting from the humidity and heat? We ask if he has air conditioning he nods yes and we are in! So for twenty bucks we are in for a three hour tour (the song from  Gilligans  Island just popped into my head). We take in the ‘old city ‘ and view some of the fortresses and walls that protected the city from invaders, built in the 15th century and incredibly well preserved.

Our tour guide has lived in  Toronto for the last ten years, but he was born and raised in Columbia. He spends his winters here. His goal is to open a barber shop in Calgary and he confides in me that he can cut anyone’s hair I start to laugh and tell him “so can I, my friend”. “You need to come to Saskatchewan” then you will really appreciate Columbia in the winter. He informs us that it rains for eight months straight in Columbia and I would really not like that, having lived in British Columbia, Canada, no relation to here.

He takes us on a tour of all his relatives crafts and trinkets places. I get the impression (yes, I am a slow learner) that this is a great gig they have going. Pick up the green horns from the ship, charge to escort them to all your favorite spots, where you get a kick back and throw in some sight seeing and you have a captive audience. We refrain from bringing back any emeralds which Columbia is known for. I don’t have room for coffee beans and nobody will let us bring back drugs. So we settle on buying a straw hat and bottled water. God it was a grueling three hours and we are hot and tired. We fall into our air-conditioned broom closet on our return and have a glorious nap before heading back up to the pool.

Supper has us sitting with the Jersey couple again and I have a feeling he may be famous for something but they don’t outright say it. He kinda looks like David Suzuki only white and six feet tall and lots of curly white afro ish hair, well maybe it is the glasses, lol. We decide after supper that we are going to get his last name and google him, now we need to run into them again.

The show tonite is a Tenor singing a variety of songs and he is very good. My girlfriend very graciously came with me even though I dissed her country music the night before, she is a much better person than I am. Dazzies has a version of dancing with the stars and once again it is freezing in there or maybe we have just had too much sun today. The upstairs lounge has a latin singer and hardly any people, so we call it a night. ARUBA tomorrow! And that song jumps into my head ‘Aruba, Jamaica .. ou I wanna take ya..’

Dessert tonight was no sugar added, so we partook of the offering. Are we having fun yet? omg, this is so perfect, I am loving it.

to be continued…