Curveballs happen… being old sucks!
It happens, life threw me a curveball and smacked me down. I pride myself on being resilient, rolling with the punches comes naturally to me as I age (gracefully or not) lol. Is there even such a thing as aging gracefully? I doubt it, the wrinkles alone make it kinda ugly. My body has taken to betraying me on new levels that continue to surprise me. Gout, sciatica, and who knows what else is lying in wait to take me down?
What’s with all these medical setbacks, is it to make me aware of how fragile my body is? Wrinkles are just a surface inconvenience. A forewarning to the real pain lying in wait for us as we get older and wiser. Well, we get wiser because we need to figure out how to cope with new pain-filled journeys into gout and then freaking sciatica. Regular aches and pains take a back seat to those two curses!
Physical pain aside though, sometimes it’s emotional pain that can lay in wait and then appear out of nowhere. I sure didn’t expect it and it burst forth outta nowhere yesterday. Well maybe not nowhere, but that story needs to rest until I’m ready to deal with it. So yesterday was full of these new feelings of complete sadness for me. Being an optimist and a positive person, I strive every day to accomplish my goal of living with a positive attitude.
But yesterday out of nowhere I had a meltdown, I’m not gonna lie, the tears were freaking me out. It was unexpected and caught me unaware because I’m tough and not prone to letting myself go.
It was a day of many surprises for me, ups and downs and complete turnarounds, it sounds crazy I know. What do others do I wonder, the pain is real and the sadness is also a force to be reckoned with. I was happy and I was sad and not at all used to dealing with so many emotions running amuck in my psyche. This is an old body, and I need my strength to fight not only health issues, and regular aches, and pains, but also just getting up from the couch without needing a sky hook!
My kids checked in with me yesterday, just about every one of them. Maybe that was the the reason for my meltdown, I miss them so much and I was homesick. How does an old person deal with homesickness… well I know now and it wasn’t pretty.
Fast forward to this morning. I awoke from a night of sex-filled dreams… I know, where the hell did that come from, crazy but true. I don’t hold much back and I still like sex and so be it I guess. My kids’ eyes are bleeding if they are reading this, but they know I write about everything, sorry kids : ) We may be old but sex is still on the table for a lot of us, but it’s much more pleasurable in a bed… just saying. lol
My foray into the pool was even more pleasurable than usual. A beautiful morning with a deep blue sky, and pristine clear water, and I have to say the whole experience was… I want to say spiritual. It’s my ritual most mornings, when in the pool, I have one in my condo at home as well, to give thanks to my higher power for my good fortune to just be here and have these experiences. I’m also thankful for living my best life which started after sixty years of age.
Being older sucks, yes… but I wouldn’t trade it to be younger again. We mellow with age, we truly are wiser, the shit that used to freak us out when younger doesn’t compute anymore. We’ve lived it, loved it, and done it, which covers pretty much everything. The good the bad and even the ugly… but not Tom Selleck, he is still a virgin to me, but I’m not dead yet so hope springs eternal, ya I know.
My funk is gone today, life has taken a 360-degree turn and my life is good. I am fed and watered and now after spilling my guts out onto this blog, I feel a nap coming on. Gee, maybe I’ll have a sex-filled dream with Tom…hmmmm, if that happens, kill me now and I will die and live happily in the ever-after.
and that’s a wrap…
The pictures above are old me and young me… a lifetime ago : )
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March 1st, 2025